December Mischief
by Jasque
Summary: 6 year olds can be quite a handful, especially when they are the Charmings and the Stiltskins. (Prompt: Ariel, Nealfire, kittens, surprise & anniversary)


A/N: A Rumbelle Secret Santa (RSS) Gift for IntheHollows. Hugs to misterpointy for beta'ing and to my RSS recipient: YOU ARE WONDERFUL! I had to cut down chunks of it for consistency sake.

* * *

This is pandemonium. She is literally living in it. The children covered in flour aren't six year olds. They're demons sent by Ceto as revenge for beating her at her own game. Of that much she is certain.

Flour blankets the kitchen floor and varying colours of cake batter splatters the walls and ceiling. Her heart skips a beat when she spots the dark red stain. She hopes it's food colouring, not blood. Eggshells and chocolate chips litter the floor and the stove looks slightly singed. Her head throbs when she thinks about cleaning up this mess.

Her eyes threaten to become slits as she glares at the troublemakers. The little demons responsible look at her with wide eyes, an air of innocence surrounding them. The girl looks close to tears. Her friend holds her hand firmly, reassuring her of his presence and protection.

Ariel wonders where the other two kids are. She wasn't gone long and thought Snow would have better control over them. Taking careful steps around the mess, she searches for Snow—surely she wasn't killed by four children.

"Ariel," a tiny voice squeaks with a gentle tug on her skirt, her friend still standing close and glowering. Ariel lowers herself to their level and smiles, hoping it isn't a grimace. They're testing her patience. Her optimism is challenged with each trouble caused every passing day. "Snow's asleep in the backyard," she bites her lower lip and continues, "David and Emma too."

That is news to her—judging by the mess, it should be impossible for anyone to sleep through the commotion. The girl bites her lip again and gives her enterprising bodyguard a gentle tug. The floor covered in flour and bare feet coated with egg yolk causes slippage when she tugs too hard. Ariel's hands dart out to catch him on instinct, but he manages to keep his balance.

"Rum," her sharp whispers are accompanied by more tugging.

The boy sighs exasperatedly and gives Ariel a pointed glare. "I put a dream spell on them," he retorts. "How long will it last?" his shrug is her only answer.

She didn't expect this. He is supposed to be able to perform weak magic only. Changing colours. Bringing toys to life. Making rainbows curve between his palms. That kind of magic. He isn't supposed to be able to put one person under a spell, let alone three. The Blue Fairy said so herself. Ugh ... she could use a drink right now.

"They should've listened and let us bake," he folds his arms and continues, "Belle wants to bake. What she wants she gets."

She needs to crawl under a blanket with a hot cup of green tea. Eric would massage away the pounding in her head. Maybe a swim in the ocean would do her good. That always calms her down.

Eric told her stories about children, spinning tales about little angels spreading nothing but joy and unicorn poop. He did warn her about their occasional terror. She even handled a few at the daycare facility in Storybrooke. At worst the concept of sharing was lost on the children or the occasional temper tantrum. Nothing candy and toys couldn't solve.

This group of children are no ordinary school of fish. If they're anything, they're kappa sent by Ceto disguised as children. Who else has a vendetta against her? Ariel tricked the sea goddess into giving her the Golden Goblet and she has held one of her legendary grudges ever since then.

She snaps out of her thoughts when she feels the cool floor and its sticky mess clinging to her knees. She hopes Eric isn't planning on starting a family soon.

Ariel gathers the shreds of her optimism and holds out a hand. Belle clasps her fingers and walks with her to the backyard, Rumpelstiltskin trailing behind them.

They walk in silence, leaving trails of white footprints on the floor. The backyard is full of flowers and covered with a soft bed of grass. The idyllic scene contradicts Ariel's state of mind. It doesn't take long to find the Charmings asleep on a picnic blanket, sandwiches and cupcakes spread out. Snow's white dress contrasts the blanket, a garish mix of pink and green.

Emma lay sucking her thumb and clinging to Snow's hand to her left. David snores lightly and sprawls in an undignified manner to her right. The scene is picturesque, but it might look better if David wasn't a six year old. Ariel wonders for the umpteenth time when they'll grow back up.

Ariel hopes Rumpelstiltskin will be able to lift the dream spell; the Blue Fairy is in such a horrible mood these days.

Snow was the one to find 6 year olds in place of their adult counterparts. David and Emma went to Rumpelstiltskin's house after a break-in call from Belle. When hours passed and no contact was made by husband and daughter, Snow decided to rescue them from Rumpelstiltskin's house.

The children were slightly dazed. Piecing together their jumbled response it appears that a vial of potion was broken in the ensuing scuffle between Rumpelstiltskin and the burglar. Belle's gasp of pain when she stepped on the broken glass was the only distraction the man needed to escape Rumpelstiltskin's clutches. Busily attending to Belle, Rumpelstiltskin was unaware of the potion's fumes. By the time Emma and David arrived, what remains of the dissipating fumes was enough to turn them into 6 year olds.

The Blue Fairy said it was a botched de-aging potion. The only way for them to grow back up is either to wait out the potion's effects or to come up with an antidote. Obviously they chose the former option, especially after experiencing the children's 'sunny personalities'.

The end result is four children who have dragged her through too many rosebushes and two near death experiences.

Tugging on Rumpelstiltskin's hand, Belle indicates at the sleeping bodies. Rumpelstiltskin eyebrows knit together and lifts his hands to reverse the spell. Ariel holds her breath, hoping it won't backfire and turn them into pancakes.

* * *

Neal is exhausted and frustrated. Eighteen days of failed research. Eighteen days of coming home to a rambunctious group of six year olds. They are watered down kappa, just how Ariel described them.

No one knows why his father made the potion. No one except him. He is certain the potion was meant for him but his father refuses to admit it. Neal assumes it was made after the offer to de-age him in Manhattan, but that doesn't answer why he kept it since they're now on good terms.

He doesn't know what to think anymore, so plays Scales and Arpeggios with his son on the piano in the makeshift playroom on Sunday morning. Ariel introduced The Aristocats to the kappa. Belle fell in love with the songs, batting her eyelashes and pouting to convince his father to sing along with her and rewarding him with a kiss on the cheek.

Three kittens that look suspiciously like those from the movie are using his father as a scratching post as he sings off-key. Belle has adopted the homeless kittens. "What she wants, she gets," his father had said, which is why some parts of the house smell like kitten excrement.

"Rum! Can you make my bouncy house bigger?" Emma stumbles out of said bouncy house and stops next to Rumpelstiltskin, lightly elbowing his chest with a smile.

"Emma, you know we're not allowed to." Belle warns, "Anyway, Rum is still exhausted from lifting the dream spell."

"No magic today, I'm afraid." Belle raises one eyebrow and he hastily adds, "No more magic, ever."

Emma shrugs and goes back into the bouncy house. She is bored playing on her own while David is out with Snow and Ariel shopping for food. Neal tears his gaze away from the bouncy house when Henry asks him where he learned to play the piano. He was half-way into regaling his tale when the playroom door creaks open and Ariel peeks in.

"We brought burgers from Granny's. They're in the kitchen." At the mention of burgers, the children scramble toward the door with kittens trotting behind them.

Henry's stomach rumbles as the smell of burgers wafts into the playroom.

"C'mon buddy, let's feed that grumbling stomach of yours."

The smell intensifies as they approach the kitchen. Emma is gnawing on her food like hungry a cannibal, smearing ketchup and mustard on her face and clothes. Belle and his father sit on the floor with the kittens, tearing pieces of their burger patties off for them.

David on the other hand is acting like the perfect prince charming. He sits next to Snow, constantly offering his food to her and smiling goofily.

All in all it appears to be a day without mayhem, just how the adults prefer it. That is until the children start to fight over fries.

Emma turns to David and whines, "Those are my fries!"

"No! They're mine!"

Emma snatches up a ketchup bottle and squirts it at David, who quickly ducks.

Neal now understands why there are permanent dark circles under Snow's and Ariel's eyes.

Snow isn't fast enough to stop Emma from throwing her beef patty at David, who blocks it with his plastic plate. Unfortunately for them, the patty lands on the side of Belle's face. Everyone freezes. Rumpelstiltskin's eyes narrow into slits.

The refrigerator and cabinets rattle as everything flies out, launching aerial attacks on the poor unfortunate souls. The adults are screaming. The children are laughing.

After two days of peace and quiet, mayhem erupts in the house once again.

Ten minutes later Neal is covered in chocolate syrup and rainbow sprinkles, defending himself from a flying mop while Henry protects his back from a dozen flying spatulas. Ariel screams strings of curses from the living room as glass shatters and Snow shouts instructions to her and the children. Rumpelstiltskin and Belle zoom in on a flying broom as he strikes down the mop.

"You need to stop this," Neal orders his father. "Remove the magic."

His father doesn't know how; he has tried and nothing works. This madness has to be waited out, like the wings. Neal hopes they'll find an antidote soon because at this rate they might blow up the house and everyone in it.

Three hours later, the adults and children are tied up in the playroom. The kitchen utensils glinting menacingly and dancing around them reminded Neal too much of his Neverland days.

Rumpelstiltskin drools to Neal's right, head tucked in the crook of Belle's neck and the kittens dozed off between them; to his left, Snow looks dead to the world and Ariel fidgets.

"Snow, I need to go. I can't hold it in."

"Ask the orange juice bottle over there," Snow replies tiredly. "He looks half empty."

Hell. He is definitely in Hell.

* * *

Christmas Eve crawls up on them like a ghost. There's still no antidote. There's still no change, and the house has gone through so many magical disasters that you'd wonder how it's still standing.

The children sleep sprawled on the living room floor, pillows and layers of blankets separating them from the cold parquet floor. Three restless kittens jump on their sleeping bodies, swatting their hair and pawing their noses. The white kitten is about to nibble on Rumpelstiltskin's toes when a gust of wind blows through the house, sending them scampering for warmth under his hands.

Noise travels down the hallway, grunting accompanied by dragging. Then more grunting and a small rattle, as if little trinkets were slightly tipped. The kittens trot curiously towards the entrance separating the living room from the hallway. They watch with interest as Ariel hauls the tree into a corner and puts it upright in its stand, quietly as she can.

"Ariel?" Snow whispers.

Ariel smiles at her handiwork. "What do you think of the tree?"

"Is it Christmas already?" Snow frowns.

"Christmas Eve."

"How did you...?" Snow indicates the fir standing proudly in the corner.

"Eric helped pick it out. I sent him home to get the decorations," Ariel says enthusiastically, "it's not as heavy as it looks."

Someone sneezes and the two women turn to see David rubbing his eyes, blinking blearily at his surroundings. His face lights up when he notices the tree.

"Is it Christmas?" he asks them.

Two more bodies stretch and wiggle underneath the blanket.

"Christmas!" Emma and Henry scream simultaneously. Rumpelstiltskin hurls a pillow towards them but it hits Belle instead. After a round of laughter, profuse apologies and forgiveness the children crowd around the tree to admire it. Emma lets the branches run over the top of her head, enjoying the feeling of being gently scratched like a cat.

Ariel explains that it is Christmas Eve and they'll decorate it once Eric shows up when Eric walks in with a box full of baubles. The children squeal and ransack the box. Fifteen minutes later two of them are tangled in the string of lights while the other two fight over who gets to put up the angel.

The day proves to be a good one. Snow prays for no mishaps or temper tantrums. Ariel is doing some kind of ritual with Henry, David and Emma in the backyard, asking for a white Christmas. Looking at her small family from the glass doors, Snow's lost in thoughts of a second child.

Alone in the kitchen and face scrunched up in concentration, Eric makes a meal of smoothies, tuna salad, and roasted chicken salad wrap. He is halfway done with the tuna salad when two heads peek at him around the kitchen door and ask if they can help. A few minutes later Snow finds them with their heads bent over their plates, paying attention to the meal's presentation.

"Eric, could I have a smoothie? David is feeling cranky."

"Cranky or seeking your attention?" Eric says with a wink. This earns him a swat on the arm followed by a tinkling laughter.

Snow's prayers are answered when the rest of the day passes without much trouble, apart from David locked in the basement with a talking washing machine. Things went smoothly even after Henry came over with Neal to suggest that everyone makes their own presents.

It was a wonderful and uneventful day, until Christmas came.

Rumpelstiltskin turns and buries himself under the blanket as sunlight streams through the glass doors. His pillow groans and snuggles him closer. He wonders when he bought a pillow that smelled like citrus, warm and soft almost like skin. Pillows aren't supposed to groan. They're not supposed to giggle, either.

He opens one eye and fills his vision with golden hair curling in every direction. He looks down and notices his pillow is in fact a large expanse of skin. Alarms go off in his head, screaming words like "Emma" and "naked" at him. He lets her go and stands up to look at his surroundings. He wishes he hadn't.

David is sprawled in an undignified manner, looking as naked as Emma. Noticing his own nakedness he looks for something to cover himself with when Neal and Henry walk in.

His son is the first to recover from the shock. "What happened?" he demands.

"You're naked," is Henry's horrified response. "You're all naked!"

Belle emerges from beneath her blanket grumbling about "headache" and "morning people", baring herself to a room full of shocked men.

"Belle!"

"Wow!"

"Rumpel?"

"Papa!"

Neal's shout works like an alarm clock to wake up everyone else. Footsteps thump down the stairs as everyone in the living room groans. Then all Hell breaks loose.

An hour later everyone gathers in the living room, desperately trying not to look each other in the eye. Emma has a blank look on her face, while Snow channels her comfort to David who has the same expression as Emma. Ariel, Eric and Henry look ready to shop for bleaching agents. Neal looks less than amused. Rumpelstiltskin will ask if he would like those memories erased, specifically memories of seeing Belle naked. Belle is quiet, holding his hand in a death grip. A certain cricket may be left with more than an extra hundred dollars in his pocket after today.

After all is said and done everyone is anxious to leave.

"Not yet. You made presents yesterday," Henry points at the stack of gifts wrapped in red and green paper. "They're under the tree."

No one knows how to react, so Henry picks up the presents and calls out their names. A palpable awkwardness settles once again as everyone is uncertain how to proceed after all the presents are given out. David is the first to break the silence.

"So, um...thanks for the gift. We...we better get going. So, um...bye."

Everyone leaves after saying their goodbyes. Everyone except for Neal.

Approaching his father he asks one question that has been nagging at him for weeks.

"Papa, about the potion. Was it meant for me?"

Heaving a sigh, Rumpelstilstkin answers, "Yes, it was. I made it in a moment of weakness after Manhattan." Rumplestiltskin pauses and a brief pained look flitted across his face. He raises a finger to interrupt his son's next question.

"Before you ask, the answer is 'no'. I do not intend on using it, not after how far we came. As for the potion, I actually forgot I made it."

The tension in Neal's frame loosens. He covers his father in a bone crushing hug and promises to be there for Christmas dinner.

Belle turns to Rumpelstiltskin once they're alone in the house and bites her lower lip, unsure and trying her best to forget about naked Charmings. Maybe she needs to get some sleep and sort herself out. Her mind is wandering when she spots something above his leans in and kisses him softly on the lips, startling the jittery man.

"Mistletoe," she whispers. He looks up and smiles at her.

She steps back, planning to go home to her apartment above the library when his hand grasps hers. He cradles it gently and asks, "Stay."

Belle smiles. They're moving forward. Maybe next year he'll stop fiddling with the red velvet box he thinks she doesn't know about. Whatever he decides, he'll never get rid of the kittens.


End file.
